I #lovemnwinter! Today I love #noexpectations.
By Dakota Sexton
What do I love about biking in winter? So many things. The quiet! The sense of freedom! But also just the lack of expectations I put on myself. That’s really huge for me, especially these past few weeks. And I couldn’t be more grateful for it.
Because I stopped working as an editor at a job in print publishing a couple of weeks ago. And since then, my life for the most part has kept on going. But sometimes there’s angst: the dumb, circular-thinking kind of angst. The what-am-I-even-doing kind of angst. And I don’t really know. I haven’t written anything in my free time in a while. And while I definitely do have a lot of interests outside of publishing, working as an editor is the only thing I’ve done – for longer than a year – for the last 6 years.
So I’ve felt terrified, and upset, and excited, and hopeful. And then generally terrified again.
But none of that matters on my bike. It doesn’t matter what I did two weeks ago. Or if I ride really slowly. Or if I barrel down a ramp to the greenway on a sheet of ice – instead of riding slowly – and spectacularly wipe out.
On most rides I take these days by myself, I’m also essentially nobody. I’ve come to love that. I love the fact that I don’t have to pretend to be someone. Anyone. And I love how silent and magical the trails can feel on an evening ride, especially after a big day of snow.
No existential angst about my identity – or any of the weird fears I’ve had about taking a detour with my life, for that matter – are ever going to change that. I’m whomever I want to be. And today, I rode a bike.
And yeah, it was cool.
About the author: Dakota is a tiny, fierce bird you might have seen somewhere, probably.
Read about this collaborative challenge to love one thing about winter everyday in February, and post about it on this blog. Tweet your own loves: #lovemnwinter @greaseragmpls, or check out last year's #lovemnwinter posts.