Conversation #3:

I don't like it when you lock me up next to ugly bikes.

Are you serious?

Yeah... I mean... what if the ugly is contagious?

Oh for Christ's sake.

I'm just sayin', maybe if you lock me up next to that sexy DeRosa over there, we might hit things off.

Hit what off?  What does that even mean?  It's not like you can procreate!

Get over yourself, fleshbag. and while you're at it, get me a new saddle.  Something sleek with some aerodynamics to it.

Listen here, Sioux, if I do that, it's going to be for my crotch's sake, not for your crush on some greasy Italian.

Sounds like a win-win to me!

I really could use a new saddle...

Yes, YES!

Fine.  I will go look at saddles.  But I can't promise that there will always be sexy bikes to lock you up next to.

It's hard when you're as good looking as I am.

You're so narcissistic.  I should probably get you some streamers so you can attract the REAL lookers.

You wouldn't dare.

And that hamburger bell, I know you've really wanted that...

I hate you.  You are everything evil in this world.

What's that?  You can't wait?  Let's go get them now?

One of these days the brake cables're gonna snap when you're going down Franklin and we'll see how much that hamburger bell helps you then.

Oh Sioux, you dish it out so easily but can never handle the shit you get in return.

Let's go home already.  Huffy over there's been giving me oogly stares all day.  I need to rinse the creep off with some good fast wind.

All rights.  Home it is.